Many of us have dealt with anger at some point in their lives and many of us are still dealing with anger. Out of the many, there are some that display a consistent pattern of anger.  Anger seems to shape how they respond to daily situations, and it also seems to be the drive behind the breakdown in many of their interpersonal relationships.

How do you recognize when you are dealing with anger?  Where does anger come from?  We will discuss these different questions and more in this article.

What is Anger?

Anger is defined as a strong feeling of disgust, hostility, or annoyance.  Anger is considered an emotion, and can be displayed emotionally.  There are other words to describe anger such as rage, irritation, and vexation.  Anger is a powerful feeling.  It has the power to alter your perception.  Anger causes chemical reactions in the mind that can change how you intend to respond to provocation and stimuli.

Where Does Anger Come From?

Anger is the end result of provocation.  However, a person’s sensitivity to respond to provocation in anger is a reflection of what they could be dealing with internally.  Anger can be characterized like a volcanic eruption.  In a simple description, volcanoes erupt due to pressure from a substance called magma beneath the earth’s crust.   After series of events, this magma is pushed to the surface and an eruption occurs which spews out hot lava and ashes.

Let’s differentiate between anger as a state of existence and anger as a state of emotion.   People can walk around as anger filled individuals.  This is their state of being.  This is characterized by a lifestyle and an aura of being angry and irritable.

There are those who can be pushed to display an angry response depending upon a stimulus.  An angry response comes from a situation or a person that incites anger.  That sounds simple, right?   An angry state of being is much different.

Those who live in an angry state are very sensitive to stimuli and almost always their responses are hostile, combative, and angry-like.  This type of angry state comes from years of either holding in frustrations or not properly dealing with let downs and disappointments that have occurred in life.

A natural angry response to a situation can be managed. These responses can be well-controlled usually..  However, if you are dealing with an angry state of being, curtailing angry responses can be difficult. It will take a lot of work and a lot of self-evaluation and accountability.

What are the Characteristics of an Angry Person?

• Hostility

  A person who is in a state of anger will usually come off as a hostile type of person.  They will not be hostile towards those people who they have allowed to come into their circle of trust, but they will be hostile towards people they do not know.

  A person who exhibits a state of anger will become irritated by the smallest of things.  If you tend to get angry easily, this could be a sign that there is a deeper root within you that feeds into these types of responses.  One way to measure how well you are at managing anger is if you are susceptible to road rage often. This is not a scientific evaluation, but it is a simple way to determine if you are easily irritated.  If you are one to be easily irritated, then do some soul searching to determine why.

• Offensiveness

  An angry person will be an offensive person.  They will be either offensive or they will be offended by every little thing.  Angry people have been hurt abrasively in their past, and these hurt feelings are the result of something that was done to offend them.   If a person does not deal with the offense and how it makes them feel, they will live a life where they find offense in everything that they do not understand.

  They will also attempt to be offensive to others and usually this is done as a way to deflect the false perception of offense that they feel will be directed at them.   No one should live a life feeling offended a lot.  If you are one that feels offended easily, take that as a sign to evaluate the root cause of this.  What happened in your life that offended you that you never got over?

• Verbally Abusive

  Sometimes we find witty individuals fun to be around.  These types of characters are exhilarating.  People that tell it like it is or say whatever is on their mind can be funny.  However, sometimes, beneath the quick-wit is a hurt individual who is harboring anger.  I am not saying that all quit-witted people are angry, but you must consider if a person who is always snappy is truly dealing with some anger issues deep within.

  Angry people will use the power of their words to exert their anger and will sometimes speak to you harshly.  When you encounter a person like this, you must see past their words and hear the anger or the root of their anger speaking.  If you are a snappy individual, ask yourself if the people you have been verbally abusive toward do or say anything to warrant your abusive words.  Sometimes, it is the anger inside that causes these types of responses.

• Uncontrollable Outbursts and Erraticism

  A person who has an angry disposition will display erratic and irrational behavior.  They will overreact to stimuli and their angry reactions will not seem rational.  These types of outbursts are dangerous as they can lead to violence.

  A person who is not in control of themselves is subject to committing violent acts to harm themselves or others.  Therefore, pay close attention to someone that you feel is grossly angry especially if their anger is directed towards you.   This person could be a danger to you.

• 
  If you are a type of person that can have an erratic outburst that leads you to a place of losing control, then you may be dealing with suppressed issues that are feeding your anger.  It could lead you to lose control of yourself and do something harmful.

Dealing with Angry People

Anger is an emotion that can be provocative and contagious.  If we are not careful, we can allow someone else’s anger cause us to display anger ourselves.  You must be able to discern when you are dealing with a person who shows symptoms of deep-seated anger.  You will only play into their hurts and exasperate their issues if you combat their anger with anger.  These types of people need much love and care.  Albeit, some of these people will not allow you to give them love and care.  In those cases, you must leave them to be to themselves and preserve your own integrity by not letting their anger affect you.

Are You Dealing With Anger?

If you discover that you are dealing with anger, I would encourage you to go and seek help from a Licensed Professional Counselor.  (Those who are in the State of Georiga, go to www.lpcaga.org to locate a therapist. If you are elsewhere, you may do a google search for therapist and anger management classes in your area.) These therapy sessions will allow you to get to the root of your anger problems.   You may also get started by taking an online self-assessment to measure if you may have signs of anger management issues.

What To Do If You Feel You Are Dealing With Anger.

You do not have to be affected by anger and you can undo the effects that your past hurts have had on you and your emotions.  Do not remain in an angry state.  Being in an angry state only causes you to be inhibited and stuck on the inside.  Allow yourself and your heart and remove the hurt and the anger.

I remember a time in my past where I realized that I was an angry person.  I was holding on to a lot of let downs and one major hurt from my past.  My anger stemmed from when I was younger and how I did not fit in well.  I was teased.  I was also angry because society made it hard for me to be myself.

All of these things made me a rigid person.  I mastered the ability to cut people with words.  I share this to point out that you do not have to show erratic behavior or be physically violent to have an anger problem.  You can be meek and mild mannered but still display signs that you harbor anger.  Holding on to anger will erode your heart and cause you to dismantle the relationships in your life.  If you are angry all the time, figure out why and get the help you need to get past it.