Over the weekend, my husband and I drove to my hometown from Atlanta. It was a 2-hour drive. As we were about 45 minutes away, my husband was asleep, but I noticed something.
I was in the fast lane zooming and making strides when I came upon a blue Jeep Cherokee. On the back window, it had “Black Lives Matter!” written in that white marker that you see when a high school football team wins a championship or something.
Then on the side windows it said, “You matter, Yes, You matter!”
As I passed this car, my first internal thought was, “yes, Black Lives Matter,” but it was the “You Matter” that caught my attention. When I drove by, I looked over to see a white woman with a baseball cap sitting 10 and 2 riding comfortably down the lanes with her “Black Lives Matter” marked up windows.
She looked like a soccer mom, and if you don’t know what that is, google it and read the stereotype for this term. Suffice to say, at that moment, I internalized “You Matter,” and if I wasn’t driving past her so quickly, I would’ve thrown may thumbs up to her through the sunroof and honk the horn in solidarity and appreciation.
Systemic Racism: A Deep-Rooted Phenomenon
Black people all over the world come from a long history of being subservient slaves or second class people to colonizers who were usually white European people. Whole world systems have been constructed on the premise that white skin is prettier, more favored, and better than dark skin. We are far removed from the days where blacks had to seek the approval of ‘Masta’ to walk across the field, but 400 years later in America, Black people are still seeking approval to exist equally in a society that is systemically hostile towards them.
Black Lives Matter is not just a movement, but it is an inherent emotional plea from black people in America for the white-establish systems to finally see us. We want to be seen by white people.
What infuriates me is when I hear sentiments and attitudes from some white people that only perpetuate the outcry that black people are just simply not “seen”. We will continue to not be seen until the white people who “get it” speak out louder than the white people who don’t get it.
White People: Black Lives Do Matter
Listen, white people “who don’t get it”, yes, all lives matter, but right now black lives matter because they have never mattered to people who think like you. I recognize that all of this is programming. I get it. Racist white people didn’t come into this world racist, but they grew up with a misunderstanding and ignorance of their privileged position compared to black people in America.
Educate yourselves on why there is a movement and the background behind it all. Also, evaluate why you feel defensive when black people and those who support us shout, “Black Lives Matter.” Consider if it is privilege that makes you afraid of everyone being treated equally by the systems that govern us.
White privilege is Emmit Till’s accuser being believed the instant she made her accusation, but yet others immediately question whether a noose being placed in the garage of a Nascar driver who advocates the BLM movement is a true story or not. It is white people being schooled in zones that keeps them exclusively sheltered from the reality of black people and their culture, and perhaps this is why so many racist whites don’t really get it. They were never taught to get it.
Some White People Don’t Get It
Segregation created a system where black people were systemically drawn out of inclusion. White people were emphatically and systemically taught that black and white people should be separated. Whites received better access, almost exclusive transference of wealth compared to blacks, access to healthcare and so much more. Black Lives Matter is the result of segregation and the pathway it perpetually created for the black family in America. And this is the reason why some whites can sincerely respond “All Lives Matter” to the BLM movement. They have never seen it be any other way.
These are the scales that exist over the eyes of white people who don’t get why we are saying black lives matter. They don’t see why because they have not been conditioned to see why. My best advice to white people who don’t get it is simply to expose yourself so that you can get it. Sincerely admit that you don’t get it, and then make strides to understand better.
The White Voice is Louder
I don’t believe that it is entirely impossible for white people who don’t get it to finally start to get it. My sister-in-law, who is white, gets it, but she always has gotten it. She gets it because she has two kids with my brother. She said to me, “I have black kids, so I am personally vested in not taking that shit from racists.” She runs a construction company. It’s these types of powerful white voices that we need.
The white lady on the freeway gets it. I wonder what is the exposure that helped her to understand. Perhaps she was raised in a way that allowed her to understand the world we really live in and process it in a balanced way. Or maybe she had a moment of self-reflection and said to herself, “You know something, I can do better. I can do more because as a white woman in America, my voice shouts louder and gets more attention.”